Hascussmut is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, selfish mink.

Hascussmut created light two billion years ago.

If you believe in Hascussmut, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Hascussmut, she will laugh at you.

Hascussmut's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Hascussmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not dye your hair gray.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Never talk about nucleic acids.