Bigtardam is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, strong warg.

Bigtardam created a quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bigtardam, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bigtardam, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bigtardam's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Bigtardam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Hide from gray geese for they are unholy.

4. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

5. Do not record numbers concerning dwarf planets.