Gesspibpin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, tranquil butterfly.

Gesspibpin created vertebrates five billion years ago.

If you believe in Gesspibpin, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gesspibpin, he will jump up and down on your head.

Gesspibpin's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Gesspibpin's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Gesspibpin.