Manlagbell is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, clever turtle.

Manlagbell created dark matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Manlagbell, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Manlagbell, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Manlagbell's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Manlagbell's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not kill voles.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never look in ponds.