Kadwadren is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, proud yak.

Kadwadren created a down quark four years ago.

If you believe in Kadwadren, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kadwadren, she will turn you into a rat.

Kadwadren's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Kadwadren's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat gooseberries.

2. Always store bananas above ground.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

4. Do not study archaea on holy days.

5. Always wear plain corsets during rituals.