Bithamton is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, sapient cow.

Bithamton created matter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bithamton, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bithamton, it will not care at all.

Bithamton's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Bithamton's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never remain kneeling during midday.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Never hurt gulls.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.