Wippinfid is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, weak tortoise.

Wippinfid created the universe two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wippinfid, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Wippinfid, he will turn you into a worm.

Wippinfid's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Wippinfid's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured squirrels.

2. Do not name children after turtles.

3. Do not travel during summer.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.