Ditcimcar is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, overgenerous dog.

Ditcimcar created the Tadpole Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ditcimcar, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ditcimcar, he will laugh at you.

Ditcimcar's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Ditcimcar's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain patience during days of mourning.

2. Always cleanse your hands after touching gold.

3. Ditcimcar must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never remain bowed during dusk.

5. Never eat green fruit.