Gepdavfem is a god.

He takes the form of a large, uncaring newt.

Gepdavfem created an up quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Gepdavfem, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gepdavfem, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Gepdavfem's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Gepdavfem's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear blue jumpers.

2. Erect five titanium sculptures of Gepdavfem on top of important buildings.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate eagles.

5. Always stare at clouds.