Kamdissdog is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, proud hippopotamus.

Kamdissdog created bats six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kamdissdog, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kamdissdog, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kamdissdog's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Kamdissdog's Holy Commandments

1. Learn nine new languages a year.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Sharks are not to be trusted.

5. Never feed onions to goats while wearing indigo tights.