Neldubmif is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, staggering chinchilla.

Neldubmif created vertebrates three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Neldubmif, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Neldubmif, he will be very unhappy.

Neldubmif's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Neldubmif's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from turquoise tortoises, for they are unholy.

2. Do not trade with those who eat parsnips.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never talk about dark energy.

5. Do not speak about limes.