Camquimort is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, omnipotent salamander.

Camquimort created a down quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Camquimort, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Camquimort, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Camquimort's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Camquimort's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with blue.

2. Never gather eight porpoises near bridges.

3. Never travel toward the east during winter.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Hide if three mice approach from the south.