Bosscitkip is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, benevolent manatee.

Bosscitkip created time and space nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bosscitkip, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bosscitkip, he will torture you forever.

Bosscitkip's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Bosscitkip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near whales while wearing brown rings and balancing seven iron spheres on your arms.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Erect a giant magenta sculpture of Bosscitkip in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Always pray immersed in water.