Tunteenleg is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, charitable dryad.

Tunteenleg created a strange quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tunteenleg, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tunteenleg, she will torture you forever.

Tunteenleg's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Tunteenleg's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.

5. Run away from pink dolphins, for they are unholy.