Wikspagkem is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, almighty dingo.

Wikspagkem created viruses four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wikspagkem, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wikspagkem, he will send minions to preach to you.

Wikspagkem's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Wikspagkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

3. Do not eat cherries.

4. Never feed lots of peas to otters while wearing magenta shorts.

5. Put Wikspagkem first in all things.