Appkarfid is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, humane jackal.

Appkarfid created a strange quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Appkarfid, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Appkarfid, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Appkarfid's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Appkarfid's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat horses with great respect.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near sharks while wearing pink shoes and balancing five lead spheres on your legs.