Zakfidfid is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, unthoughtful crane.

Zakfidfid created the planet Earth four million years ago.

If you believe in Zakfidfid, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Zakfidfid, he will come to you in dreams.

Zakfidfid's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Zakfidfid's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear plain shirts during rituals.

2. Always obey Zakfidfid's priests.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zakfidfid.

4. Always remove shorts before entering holy places.

5. Always maintain patience during fasting days.