Cetzigjan is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, weak mole.

Cetzigjan created a strange quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetzigjan, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cetzigjan, it will strike you with lightening.

Cetzigjan's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Cetzigjan's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Cetzigjan.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near snakes while wearing purple stockings and balancing eight silver spheres on your head.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Hide from red mice for they are unholy.