Pigcumyatt is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, cheerful wasp.

Pigcumyatt created tapeworms two billion years ago.

If you believe in Pigcumyatt, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Pigcumyatt, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Pigcumyatt's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Pigcumyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never think ill of sick great tits.

4. Do not wear silicon on your body.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.