Hapfub is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, happy hedgehog.

Hapfub created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Hapfub, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hapfub, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Hapfub's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Hapfub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always pray immersed in water.