Wigmutran is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, selfish finch.

Wigmutran created parasitic wasps two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigmutran, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wigmutran, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Wigmutran's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Wigmutran's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat spinach.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not keep nine squirrels in a large pit.

4. Never sing in the presence of moths.

5. Always make sure there are no pigs in a building before entering it.