Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, confident toad.

Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin created time and space three billion years ago.

If you believe in Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin.

2. Never think about solid mechanics near squirrels while wearing brown skirts and balancing eight titanium spheres on your face.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Davripsakbonkbossbugvogtin.

4. Never think about dark matter.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.