Flabfum is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, all-powerful mongoose.

Flabfum created the Virgo Supercluster seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabfum, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Flabfum, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Flabfum's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Flabfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Do not sprint in public.

3. Never go into violet rooms.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near otters while wearing mauve scarves.