Mabxucxuc is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, conceited jackal.

Mabxucxuc created a down quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Mabxucxuc, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Mabxucxuc, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Mabxucxuc's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Mabxucxuc's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not turn your head toward east.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. You must love Mabxucxuc.

5. Never approach rivers carrying ash.