Bastominjig is a god.

He takes the form of a large, able deer.

Bastominjig created energy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bastominjig, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bastominjig, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bastominjig's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Bastominjig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate pigs.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate tapirs.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Retreat if seven dolphins approach from the west.

5. Erect a large copper sculpture of Bastominjig on top of all buildings.