Cabweeshav is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, kind bird.

Cabweeshav created water nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabweeshav, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Cabweeshav, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Cabweeshav's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cabweeshav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare coconuts while filled with joy.

2. Do not gather at doors at midnight.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Do not take Cabweeshav's name in vain.