Ban Dapyak is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, clever crow.

Ban Dapyak created Africa eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ban Dapyak, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Ban Dapyak, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Ban Dapyak's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Ban Dapyak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never hurt shrews.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Ban Dapyak in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never talk about fire.