Kamhonban Narlkikyarp is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, astonishing spider.

Kamhonban Narlkikyarp created the Tadpole Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kamhonban Narlkikyarp, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kamhonban Narlkikyarp, he will turn you into a frog.

Kamhonban Narlkikyarp's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Kamhonban Narlkikyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Erect four lead sculptures of Kamhonban Narlkikyarp on top of important buildings.

2. Never feed lentils to monkeys while wearing trousers.

3. Do not take Kamhonban Narlkikyarp's name in vain.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Run away if eight sheep approach from the south.