Vogcatbass is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, smart dolphin.

Vogcatbass created humankind five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vogcatbass, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vogcatbass, he will destroy your favourite star.

Vogcatbass' most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Vogcatbass' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory near moths while wearing pink skirts and balancing six iron spheres on your feet.

2. Put Vogcatbass first in all things.

3. Never sing in holy places.

4. Hide if four horses approach from the east.

5. Never talk about comets.