Gesspagcet Mumpasnab is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, fussy goat.

Gesspagcet Mumpasnab created Asia five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gesspagcet Mumpasnab, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Gesspagcet Mumpasnab, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Gesspagcet Mumpasnab's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Gesspagcet Mumpasnab's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Gesspagcet Mumpasnab.

2. Hide if eight pigs approach from the south.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never eat oranges.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.