Dibbedveen is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, passionate human.

Dibbedveen created the planet Venus eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dibbedveen, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dibbedveen, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Dibbedveen's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Dibbedveen's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never think about spacetime.

3. Retreat if seven horses approach from the north.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not speak about onions.