Muttikfud is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, humorless zebra.

Muttikfud created the Milkyway seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Muttikfud, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Muttikfud, he will destroy your favourite star.

Muttikfud's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Muttikfud's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about enzymes.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near foxes while wearing brown skirts and balancing nine lead spheres on your head.

4. Never hurt tortoises.

5. Always treat eagles with great respect.