Arm is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, two-faced narwhal.

Arm created tapeworms five million years ago.

If you believe in Arm, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Arm, he will come to you in dreams.

Arm's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Arm's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of balance in the presence of strangers.

2. Do not shave your face.

3. Run away if three sheep approach from the north.

4. Arm loves pigs, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not prepare peanuts while wearing shorts.