Kansatvon is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, proud coyote.

Kansatvon created a top quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kansatvon, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Kansatvon, she will jump up and down on your head.

Kansatvon's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Kansatvon's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in holy places.

2. Never gather three shrews near wells.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not hurt sheep.