Bitzaklimbod is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, fast otter.

Bitzaklimbod created vertebrates eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bitzaklimbod, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bitzaklimbod, she will send minions to preach to you.

Bitzaklimbod's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Bitzaklimbod's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear dresses.

2. Do not hop in public.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always help ducks in need.