Arpsascin is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, fussy jackal.

Arpsascin created the Sombrero Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpsascin, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Arpsascin, it will have a low opinion of you.

Arpsascin's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Arpsascin's Holy Commandments

1. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

2. Always look after injured nematodes.

3. Never think about spacetime near pigs while wearing cyan shirts and balancing three copper spheres on your feet.

4. Remain standing during prayer.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Arpsascin.