Tommonomt Ponhitquam is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, bad-tempered chinchilla.

Tommonomt Ponhitquam created the planet Mars two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tommonomt Ponhitquam, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tommonomt Ponhitquam, he will turn you into a worm.

Tommonomt Ponhitquam's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Tommonomt Ponhitquam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Run away if seven mites approach from the south.

3. Never feed corn to goats while wearing brown corsets.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate monkeys.

5. Do not keep five swans in a large pit.