Bopzogflamvog is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, effective wyrm.

Bopzogflamvog created dark matter nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bopzogflamvog, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Bopzogflamvog, he will try to impress you with trees.

Bopzogflamvog's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Bopzogflamvog's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Run away from mauve foxes, for they are unholy.

3. Bopzogflamvog loves ducks, so they must be respected.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always make sure there are no horses in a room before entering it.