Zantenbop is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, two-faced camel.

Zantenbop created the universe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zantenbop, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Zantenbop, he will ignore you.

Zantenbop's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Zantenbop's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss ribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

2. Never gather six foxes near doors.

3. Never chant while facing south.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not listen to music.