Dibtadjip is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, narcissistic troll.

Dibtadjip created a quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Dibtadjip, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dibtadjip, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Dibtadjip's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Dibtadjip's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never feed cherries to voles while wearing coats.

3. You must never eat bananas.

4. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Dibtadjip on top of all buildings.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Dibtadjip.