Cutgemnurt is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, benevolent tapir.

Cutgemnurt created the planet Earth eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutgemnurt, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Cutgemnurt, it will destroy your home solar system.

Cutgemnurt's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Cutgemnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never cross rivers at midnight.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. You must pray to Cutgemnurt seven times a day.

4. Always face the south before whisper.

5. Do not kill swans.