Canvadhap is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, awesome penguin.

Canvadhap created the planet Jupiter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Canvadhap, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Canvadhap, he will remove you from existence.

Canvadhap's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Canvadhap's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in the presence of bats.

2. Never feed lots of corn to mites while wearing violet coats.

3. Do not contemplate dark energy during the night.

4. Never speak at midnight.

5. Always remove kilts before touching carbon.