Quamyarpvab Megbinlenflowominlidcan is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish bee.

Quamyarpvab Megbinlenflowominlidcan created humanity six billion years ago.

If you believe in Quamyarpvab Megbinlenflowominlidcan, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Quamyarpvab Megbinlenflowominlidcan, she will try to impress you with trees.

Quamyarpvab Megbinlenflowominlidcan's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Quamyarpvab Megbinlenflowominlidcan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near turtles while wearing orange trousers and balancing eight titanium spheres on your hands.

2. Hide from pink sharks for they are unholy.

3. Never stain your face with black.

4. Do not kill cats.

5. Never hurt porpoises.