Wegtik is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, cheerful squid.

Wegtik created the Cigar Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Wegtik, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Wegtik, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Wegtik's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Wegtik's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Never think ill of sick goats.

5. Run away if eight frogs approach from the south.