Sidbemdubpom is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, selfish giraffe.

Sidbemdubpom created the cosmos twelve years ago.

If you believe in Sidbemdubpom, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sidbemdubpom, she will boil you in a big pot.

Sidbemdubpom's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Sidbemdubpom's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Hide from turquoise mites for they are unholy.

3. Erect six nickel sculptures of Sidbemdubpom on top of important buildings.

4. Do not fashion tools from iron.

5. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.