Faddinpit is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, sage swan.

Faddinpit created everything that exists seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Faddinpit, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Faddinpit, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Faddinpit's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Faddinpit's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare beans during autumn.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never think ill of sick porpoises.

5. Never mark doors with magenta.