Sanpitmidkik is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, fast beaver.

Sanpitmidkik created dark matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sanpitmidkik, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Sanpitmidkik, he will turn you into a hamster.

Sanpitmidkik's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Sanpitmidkik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not bounce at mountains.

2. Never jump in the presence of voles.

3. Always treat snails with great respect.

4. Do not speak of quantum field theory near sacred fires.

5. Do not keep nine mites in a large pit.