Lambomsasjinzigfly is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, uncaring snail.

Lambomsasjinzigfly created tapeworms five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lambomsasjinzigfly, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lambomsasjinzigfly, she will be mildly annoyed.

Lambomsasjinzigfly's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Lambomsasjinzigfly's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at black holes.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Feed all hungry rats.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not eat oranges.