Wongommannarriprulmegjap is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, thoughtless turtle.

Wongommannarriprulmegjap created oxygen three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wongommannarriprulmegjap, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Wongommannarriprulmegjap, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wongommannarriprulmegjap's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Wongommannarriprulmegjap's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about whales.

2. Never pray while filled with envy.

3. Always act with obedience when addressing children.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Never wear red shirts.