Karquagflaptagbisstaftap Femdadmit is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, deceitful goblin.

Karquagflaptagbisstaftap Femdadmit created matter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Karquagflaptagbisstaftap Femdadmit, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Karquagflaptagbisstaftap Femdadmit, it will destroy your home planet.

Karquagflaptagbisstaftap Femdadmit's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Karquagflaptagbisstaftap Femdadmit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not turn your face toward north.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Never record secrets.

4. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never write about moons.